Feels are such a pain, so I’m going to ignore my sad ones right now. Instead, THINK AHEAD. GOALS.
I’ve got my essay due Monday, so I have to get back to it, but I need to list a few goals. Theyeed to be SMART goals but I will work that out in another entry. Just got to get this down. Main ones that I really really want right now, as of today. I don’t know what is going to happen but I just…need to think about something good to get my mind off things.
- Learn how to drive. Independence is crucial. I have to save up to pay for the drivers test. Then get a car, or borrow my mum’s i dunno. Then drive myself around places. I have to drive. I can’t rely on anyone anymore.
- Become actually legit independent. And pretend my parents aren’t really there doing things for me. I have to learn how to drive, so I can drive to the supermarket, buy the right things and get around. I’m 19, not 12, and I should really get skilled up. After all if I want to get to Sydney and live alone and work, I have to know MANY MANY THINGS. This means cooking, cleaning, shopping, finance management, driving, knowing the streets. I think I’m going to have to not necessarily stop hanging out with people, but spend more time learning things. In the long term, it is worth it.
- Graduate with the highest grades I can possibly achieve. I have to graduate, there is no two ways about it. And I must do really well if I want to find a job. Right now everything is a bit hazy, because of my ideas of stationery and things but I have to do really well.
- Get back to Sydney. Yeah. I miss Sydney a lot. My brother is there, the best church I’ve ever been to is there, my friends are there in Australia. I love the big feel about it, there was just so much more people and things to do, and places I’ve not been. I have pretty much seen the whole of my country, I want to open my horizons. (so cliche)
- Get my entire being fixed upon my stationery/cake goals. Or just anything that will allow me to engage in art as a serious business. I have to get it out of my head, into my hands and transform things. Get stuff done. I can’t let dreams be dreams, remember.
- Lose weight! This one is tough because of the weather, other random circumstances, but I have to make sure I don’t eat too many carbs, or junk. Eat healthy, fruits, veges, alot of water. Try to do pilates every day. Even if its only 15 mins.
- Consider the chili idea. There is a chance I could sell our family’s chili recipe to people in Asia? It’s actually the best homegrown one I have tasted and other people who my mum has given bottles to agree. It could work. I have to really invest time into experimenting with it to get it right.
And so yeah. Good things:
- I have stopped going on 9gag completely.
- I have deactivated my ‘normal’ facebook and am using my very low-key one which has about .
- Don’t youtube as much either! woohoo and today I am recommitting to the worship band at church … yeah I stopped going because I have no idea why but I’m going to do it.
- Also I’m going to join a club where I volunteer once a month with kids with autism! Excited to make a difference. I guess the best way to change your life is to help others. I always get really depressed every now and then which is completely STUPID. It’s because I just don’t like how everything is turning out. I’m going to change that, bit by bit.
Anyway, dinner and essay! Lots to do. I need to make some goals I’ll work towards. And then my life won’t be so upside down all the time.
I wonder what it’s like to live in the USA? I’ve always wanted to go there and live. See what it’s like. America is HUGE.!
Also handgliding and skydiving. Definitely on the bucket list. ONE DAY ZOË,ONE DAY.